As the sun was preparing to set behind the reddish stone buildings and green elms at school, I was walking along the path toward my apartment in Billings Hall.  I was trying to catch up with a girl named Elaine and make nice with her.  As I made my approach, I noticed she was walking next to Professor Reed, a nice guy, above my pay grade.

Reluctant to give up on my approach to Elaine, I decided I could engage them both in a discussion.

“Hi Elaine, Hi Dr. Reed!” I tried to smile innocently. They nodded pleasantly without really replying, and kept on strolling.

“Say, did you catch the lecture last night about imperialistic white males in the patriarchy?”

Elaine smiled weakly, but showed nice teeth and lips.  “We didn’t need to attend.  We already know about those guys.  Don’t we, Dr. Reed.”

Dr. Reed smiled suavely, all-knowingly, like Cary Grant.  “Senior faculty try to avoid that kind of behavior on campus, especially in broad daylight.”

“You know, while listening to  that lecture, I was thinking it was interesting, but I’d kind of like to hear the other side … maybe there might even be two other sides.”

Now, Elaine was wading into the water.  “There is no other side.”

I tried to control myself, but blurted it out. “Maybe there is another side that hasn’t made it to our campus.” 

As soon as she really grabbed the bait, I would be ready to set the hook.

I continued.  “You know, my uncle Rob went to school here.  He says, when he was in school, you know, ‘back in the day’, there were always two or more sides to everything.  Rob says that even when an issue seemed ‘open and shut’, the professors would make a case for the opposite side … like in debate.”

“My Uncle Rob says when he asked the Dean why tuition was so high, the Dean would always say: ‘You could learn most of the same content at the nearest community college.  The difference here is that we are teaching you how to read and understand, how to analyze all sides of an issue.  Then, when you take a position, we are teaching you how to speak and write, how to express yourself in a way that will help you win the day and succeed in any environment.’ ”

Now, I smiled knowingly, though not suavely. “My Uncle Rob bought that narrative and told my mother to send me here.”

Elaine was about up her knees in the water.  She looked up at Reed.

Reed was less suave and more serious, now. “I think your uncle had a point.  That is exactly what my Dean said to me about a college education in the arts and sciences.  I have probably said the same thing a few dozen times when I do campus tours.”

Now was a pause.  I waited to see if there was anything more. 

Categories: Fiction, Stories